I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
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