Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
