like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
my poor anus
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
