it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Someone came in the potted fern
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
