Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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