Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Do you have feelings for this penis?
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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