I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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