Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Randomize
