we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
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