38 yer olds are good kisserssss
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Randomize
