yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
Randomize
