did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Randomize
