meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize