Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize
