Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Randomize