Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
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