Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize