I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
