Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
