Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
