Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Randomize
