on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
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