Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
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