Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Randomize
