found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
