just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Randomize
