I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
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