Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
