i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
Randomize
