And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Randomize
