i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
