he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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