I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize