I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
