Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Randomize
