accomplished twins. life is a go
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
