no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Randomize
