There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
