why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
