I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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