Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
