I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize