yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Too much gin, very little bucket
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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