Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Just high enough for therapy.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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