She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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