I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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