i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
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