Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I could fuck to npr.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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