i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize