So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
